my tablet driver is kind of dead, so I can't make any digital pictures. I have three paintings that I should probably upload onto here...eventually. and I'm going to start working on another one soon.

I don't think I really have anything else to say.
if anyone cares about my life, then uhhh well, since august I worked crew for two shows. the first one was great, the other one was...bleh. I also got a boyfriend. but I'm single again, which is also pretty exciting. and what else? I dunno. I got a 90 on my english essay. yaaaay me.

this journal entry is really pointless, but my newest one is from august and I just wanted to get rid of it!

aaaah. I'm russian.

oh my fucking GOD. what am I supposed to do with the rest of my summer?
god, young rep was so fun. I learned so much about acting and myself, and I met some really amazing people and it was just FABULOUS. I sound like a cliche motivational speaker, but it's all true. young rep is AMAZING. I am definitely doing it next summer. hopefully.

last night was the showcase for most of the acting classes, including miiiine. my class's showcase consisted of two ensemble pieces, warm ups, rapping jabberwocky, and monologues. I don't know anything about the other ones though. nothing at all. it's kind of depressing, actually. but whatever.
my acting class is hopefully going to have a reunion party soon, and we can all be totally fabulous.

anyways, after the showcase was SO SO SOOOOO FUUUUUNNNNN. a bunch of us young rep kids (mostly the older ones. I was the second youngest person there.) went to mel's, only to find out it was closing in 30 minutes. then we all stood on the street corner trying to democratically decide what to do. finally, all the cool kids decided to go to ben's house, which is kind of far away from where we were, but luckily we know people with cars. brandon, joel, sam, and I all got a ride from alex. unfortunately, we got lost for literally an hour. then we finally reached ben's house, which did NOT have british butlers and french maids like I expected.
we ate pizza and played this reaaally fun, weird game that I don't know how to explain. oh, and then ben and this guy whose name I can't remember did this skit where they were two guys talking about baseball. "who's on first. what's on second. I don't know is on third." bwahahaaaa. then addison did an h.i. (I'm still not sure of what that is) of avenue q. he condensed the whole thing down to 10 minutes and it was AMAZING. then we all sat in a circle and told tasteless dead baby, gay, racist, etc. jokes. then we all sat around singing songs from spring awakening. it was amazing.
then a bunch of people left at 1:30 a.m. and as they were leaving, ben ran out of the bathroom yelling "is someone leaving?" and he was WET for some unknown reason. it was really...weird.
then more fun stuff happened. then at 3 a.m., I left and it was all very depressing. but before I left, ben and I had a discussion about opera metal. oooh exciting.


so apparently martha has a tall, blonde, skinny cousin who is going to the california college of the arts this year. when he comes to california, I will seriously violate him. maybe.


hmm. well, I guess that's all I really have to say.

I kind of wish it was next summer already.

so last thursday I went to my young rep audition and HOLY SHIT SON, I got in! they gave me the acceptance letter and shizz right there because supposedly I was REALLY good. yay for me.
but then again....they're actors. they were probably paid to make me feel good about myself.

that same day, before my audition, I met this really nice guy. I thought he was a creepy hobo at first, but he was actually really cool and was like, an actor and was like....in musicals and shizz. and he writes music now. and. yeah. he's just REALLY COOL.

speaking of really coolness, I'm going to the msi concert in san francisco on sunday. and I will FUCK EVERYONE THERE. or maybe not. eh, I dunno. me and my lovers (kasey and shannon) are all gonna dress like TOTAL skanks. because...well....we are totally skanks.
I would do jimmy urine anyday.

anyways, I'm gonna tell you guys about last week. or uh, friday, saturday, and sunday to be specific.
on friiiiday, after school I walked all the way to brandon's house. in the 104 degree weather. and it's like, 2 or 3 miles away from school. it was horrible and I got blisters from my FUCKING FLIP FLOPS. so then I had to put on my converse so then my feet BURNED. but then when we got to his house, we just hopped into the pool. it was pretty hot. only not really, because his pool is FREEEEZING. I love it. except I don't love it in february, because then it's too cool.
then we went to san francisco. we were gonna see octopus, buuuut the tickets were all sold out, so we just walked around the embarcadero. it was pretty awesome. and the weather was perfect. and we ate at taylor's. it was pretty tasty. mmmsquid brains wtfux.

...and then on saturday I hung out with tanner pretty much the whole day. we watched hellza margaret cho stuff on youtube. I LOVE MARGARET CHO SO MUCH. she reminds me of me...only korean. seriously. I agree with her on everything. if it were not for gay men, I wouldn't talk to any guys at all. I'm not even kidding.
anywaysss, then we saw into the woods. we saw hensley there. oh snap. but anyways, the play was full of LITTLE KIDS. or uh, people my age. and not professional actors. oh damn. and it was kind of...uhhh....I dunno. it was okay. I guess.

then on sunday, I went to shannon's house. we chilled there for a little while, then me, shannon, and kasey all walked to the movie theatre. we saw made of honor. it was okay, but pretty good for one of those predictable romantic comedies. oh, and we met up with tanner there. so that was pretty cool. then we saw prince caspian. EVERY CHARACTER IN THAT MOVIE IS A DICK. especially prince caspian. "HEY UNCLE WAKE UP I'M GONNA KILL YOU. wait. just kidding. I'm too much of a wimp to kill you. ololol now your army's gonna destroy mine. oh snap." but I guess my dislike of that movie might be the fact that I haven't seen the first narnia movie or read any of the books annnnd then movie was REALLY LONG and I'm easily distracted, especially when watching fight scenes.

and TODAAAAY tanner and I went to kasey's house. and we all banged. oh baby. not rly.


apparently, no guys like me because they all think I'm a lesbian. pfft, I'm not a lesbian. I just happen to bang more chicks than guys (haha not that I actually bang guys) because there are lots of hot bisexual chicks, but no cute, single, straight guys. and the guys that are cute and single are all GAY. but if they're straight, they're probably a unicorn.
I should just grow a dick.
dude, but seriously, I can't think of any straight guys that I'd do. I mean, there's a lot of guys I'd do in theory, but not like....in all actuality. if that makes ANY sense. which it probably doesn't.


okay. I'm going to bed. I need some SLEEP.

my life is weird.

so in the past few months of my lack of journal entries, a lot of weird stuff has happened. like...good weird. although I don't feel like talking about it all. so uhhh I dunno. here's a retarded summary of yesterday:
yesterday was make your friends sexually uncomfortable day. it's pretty difficult to do, since all my friends are whores. like, seriously, grabbing their crotches just makes them GIGGLE. WHORES! so yeah. after school, we all sat near the drama room and pretended to bang. it was hot. I was banged by a gay man against a wall. oh baby. haha. oh. and. "THIS BRA IS GAY PROOF. you can't unhook it." "I just did." "oh shit."
and thennnnn me, brandon, and kasey went to safeway. we bought some juice and a watermelon. then while outside of safeway, we saw this box of kittens. kasey took one. she's black and white and named alice noelle pizeci <insertlastnamesofmeandkaseyhereololol>. she's PRETTY HOT. and peed all over kasey and my mom's car. fun fun fun.
but anyways, then we went to brandon's house. and we drank juice and sat in his backyard and watched sex and the city. I AM SAMANTHA. seriously.
thennnn after that, we went back to our school to see this commedia dell'arte thing. it was pretty cool. anddd that was my day yesterday, pretty much.

oh, and when I got home I looked up stuff about colleges. okay, so I realized I wanna major in illustration and theatre (double majors ftw) with a minor in either psychology or russian literature and philosophy or queer studies or....well, anything cool like that. so yeah, I think I'm gonna go either to Eugene Lang, NYU, Ithaca College, Sycamore University, or...yeah, any one of those. but I'm indecisive SO I DON'T KNOW.
but what I do know is that in 3 years, I'll be a poor college student living in a tiny roach infested flat in manhattan with brandon and martha. and we're gonna be all like "YAY ART" and have hot threesomes every night. although I don't know how the threesomes would work out. hmm.

in other news, my young rep audition is on thursday. I still need to write a paragraph and get a recent photo of myself or whatever. yeah, anyways, my monologue is really cool. it's really funny and I almost have it all down. hopefully the audition will go well, but anything is possible.

so yeah.
that's all, I guess.

today I ate cranberries, blueberries, and an apple. oh, and strawberries.
now THAT is just FUCKED UP. if you know fruit language, that is.

I really want to do something right now. like go to someone's house. or complain about things that I can complain about. but everyone's either busy or can't come over to my house. and I have no way of getting anywhere. shiiiit son.
ugghhh I hate not doing things. because if I'm sitting at home, I get bored and then I eat food and my fingers. and then I get fat and my fingers get icky and then I DIE.

oh man, so I recently realized that I do not like short hitler children that much at all. I actually prefer tall blonde babes with brown eyes. and dsl. I still dig the dsl. and I suddenly dig tall people because THEY ARE FUN TO HUG. amirite?

I really want to hang out with apple right now.

dude, I need to check my voice mail more often. I keep on missing really important calls. like that one call with the stuff and yeah.

jesus christ.

someone kidnap right now. I don't like sitting at home. it gives me bad posture and makes me FAT.
ugghhhh.